Get Over Yourself

A trend I tend to see a lot on Facebook is the "Too cool for Facebook" poster. You probably all have at least one person like that on your friends list. If not, it's probably you ;) They join FB with much fanfare, posting about how a friend/family member/coworker finally convinced them to join. Even though they are MUCH too busy, because they actually have a life. Then they proceed to post every couple days about how they are "never" on, because they are much too busy, and so on. About three months or so after joining, they post a long status update about how they are deactivating their FB. Of course you know why, too busy, actually have a life, etc. If you want to get a hold of them, call or text, like in the old days. Naturally life goes on as normal, and you may, or may not give that friend any thought for the next three months or so. Then suddenly, a friend request pops up from them. Again. You may briefly be confused. "Aren't we already friends??" But then you'll remember how they are, or were it seems, much too busy for FB. Guess they must not have a life these days. You accept the request, and first thing you see is their post about rejoining Facebook. As it turns out, they are still much too busy, and still have a life. They just rejoined FB to keep in touch with family and friends far away. Whew! Good to know, you were worried for a minute that maybe they weren't busy anymore. Cue the daily, or semi daily posts about the evils of FB, and how busy they are. They actually HAVE a life you know....

Don't Lose The Magic!

Do you remember being a kid, and thinking that fairies, and leprechauns and unicorns were real? Me too. My mother never sat me down and explained that all of those things are fake, and to stop believing in them. She let me outgrow them naturally. And now, when she tells me about a book she just finished that I have to read, she doesn't say "It's about fairies, but those aren't real, okay?". She simply says "it was a great series, it's all about fairies and based in Ireland ". But these days parents seem to want their children to grow up way to fast. No one believes in magic, or allows their children to, anymore. It makes me so sad, not only for the child, but for the parents as well. One of my favorite things about being a parent, is being able to see the world as a child again. When my daughter sees fireflies, and says "Look Mommy! Fairies!!" I don't say "no Alyssa, those are just bugs". I say "Wow, would you look at that!". On Christmas Eve, when she sees a red light in the sky and says "Mom, look, it's Rudolph!", I don't correct her with "That's an airplane Alyssa." I tell her that she better get to bed then, because Santa must be close. My children will only be little for a short time. I'm in no hurry to make them grow up. My nine year old asked me the other day if it was "too babyish" to call me mommy. I told him he can call me mommy for as long as he likes, and I will never tell him he's too old. I'm certain that this will not cause him to still be calling me mommy when he goes off to college. I'm not concerned that Alyssa will drop out of school and move to Ireland to search for leprechauns, or that Lucas will run off in search of the elusive unicorn. But I am going to let them be kids, and keep that childhood magic, as long as possible. I, in turn, get to keep the magic awhile longer too. Children do grow up, they stop believing in magical things. But, if they are really lucky, they get to have children of their own. Then, for a little while at least, they can believe in magic again.

Someone Fetch Me My Escape Goat!

Now this may come as a shock, but Facebook is not the only place on the internet filled with awful spelling and grammar. There is also Babycenter. If you have never heard of Babycenter (BBC), well you probably don't have kids. Seriously though, it's a message board for pregnant women and parents. It's mostly mothers, but you have the occasional father as well. It can be a great place to go for information and/or support. My birth board for my daughter was, and still is, the best group of ladies ever. We are still a very close knit group, even five years later. It can also be a place full of heated debates over everything. Such as breast vs bottle, cloth diapers vs disposable, or if you should vaccinate or not. Not to mention the always fun chocolate milk threads ;) And the spelling.... Oh the spelling.

Today I was reading a post on the birth board for my youngest. A mother was asking for advice on an overly clingy baby. Several moms commented, but then I saw this: "wraps his arms around my leg and balls." Wha..? o_O After several very confused seconds, I realized that she meant BAWLS, as in cries. Not balls, as in testicles. Well, that makes a bit more sense. I continued to read different posts on the site, and saw somany lovely gems. Such as a young "pregnate" girl, someone who had all their belongings thrown out on the "curve", and someone who was not vaccinated, and "either" were her parents.

I think my all time favorite though (so far, of course), is the escape goat. A young lady was complaining about her "syco MIL". It didn't take long for the group to decipher that how she meant it: phsyco mother-in-law. They proceeded to give her their usual brand of advice, and a few snarky comments on her spelling. No, I was not one of them. I very rarely post on DWIL. Then the OP, or "original poster", came back to update. She proceeded to give more details, then complained that her mother-in-law was "accusing me of using her as my escape goat!". Cue the pictures of goats in saddles.

That awkward moment when....

You don't actually know what the word awkward means. Here you go:


awk·ward  (ôkwrd)
adj.
1. Not graceful; ungainly.
2.
a. Not dexterous; clumsy.
b. Clumsily or unskillfully performed: The opera was marred by an awkward aria.
3.
a. Difficult to handle or manage: an awkward bundle to carry.
b. Difficult to effect; uncomfortable: an awkward pose.
4.
a. Marked by or causing embarrassment or discomfort: an awkward remark; an awkward silence.
b. Requiring great tact, ingenuity, skill, and discretion: An awkward situation arose during the peace talks.
[Middle English awkeward, in the wrong way : awke, wrong (from Old Norse öfugr, backward; see apo- in Indo-European roots) + -ward, -ward.]
awkward·ly adv.
awkward·ness n.

I am constantly seeing "that awkward moment when..." posts. Some of them are funny. Such as "That awkward moment when you find out that your new boss is your husband's ex.", or "That awkward moment when you call your friend a bitch and she's standing behind you.". Yes, those are both pretty awkward situations. However, "that awkward moment when you can't find your cell phone" and "that awkward moment when you stub your toe and it really hurts!"? Not awkward. Inconvienent? Yes. Annoying? Yes. Even painful? Sometimes, yes. But not awkward. If you are going to constantly use a word, at least know what it means.

Small Business

I have noticed a major trend on Facebook. Everyone has a business of some kind. Some people are photographers, some are cake makers, or sell Avon. But I'm betting at least one person on your friends list has a business of some kind. If not, then you probably do. I have no problem with people promoting their business via a FB page. However, if you are going to do this, you should at least spell words correctly, and use proper grammar. I recently saw a page for a candy making business, in which the word marshmallow was spelled marshmello and homemade was homade. Rambling and run on sentences are very unprofessional as well. It's okay to promote yourself, but please do not post 17 times an hour, and never in all caps. STOP YELLING AT ME! If people are not responding to your many, many posts, I don't think it's because you wrote in lowercase letters.

On a similar note, if you are constantly posting about your business, and no one is responding, there might be a reason. Just because you own a camera, that does not make you a photographer, knowing how to work an oven does not make you a baker. A lot of people do have genuine talent, and do very well. For instance, I have someone on my friends list who makes hats. She does a wonderful job, and her page is very well written. I will gladly go to her in the event that I find myself needing a hat for myself, or a loved one. The people on my page, however, who have several different "business" that they post about non stop, with very poorly written pages/posts, do not, and will not, get my business. Just because it's on Facebook, doesn't mean that it shouldn't look professional.

TAKE CARE OF YOUR KIDS!!!!!!

Seriously. What is wrong with people?? Why does no one want to just take care of their own damn kids these days? Now I understand, some people have to work. That is understandable. But if you send your kid to a sitter every single weekend, especially if you work too, so you can party, then you should have waited to have kids. Plain and simple. Having a "date night" every couple weeks, or even once a week, fine. However, if you ship your kid off to anyone who will take him or her every chance you get, you disgust me. Or if you leave your kids home alone so you can go down the street to get wasted. You don't deserve kids. Some parents have kids who have died, or are dying right now. They have or had precious little time with their babies. Yet you so willingly give yours up?! Why? Honestly, tell me why? What in the world is more important than your child? Drinking and partying? Before you know it, your kid won't want to hang out with you. They will be a teenager, who just wants to go out with their friends. You'll have plenty of time to go out and do anything you want then. You can NEVER get this time back. People always make rude, snarky comments, and joke about the fact that I (almost) never have/let anyone watch my children. Why is it a bad thing that I enjoy being with my kids? They won't be little forever. One day, much too soon, they will have their own things to do. I will have plenty of time to myself then. Of course everyone, even myself, needs a break sometimes. But hang out with your kids sometimes too! I bet they are fun. You don't need to buy them everything under the sun to give them a good childhood. Just be there, with them. It doesn't matter how much stuff you cram into their room if they are never in it anyway! Now, before you start talking about "fostering independence" and all that crap, let me be clear. I am not saying that children should never be babysat, or that they should spend every waking moment with you. My children have been babysat. My older two both go to school, and do quite well. My oldest goes to his best friend's almost every day after school. The baby spends pretty much every moment with me, but he's only 10 months old, give me a break here. I am just saying that if every single thing you do, or are invited to, does not allow kids, you might need some new hobbies, or new friends. If every single weekend you need a sitter for the entire weekend, you might be partying a bit too much. My friend's little boy is sick. He very well might not be around next year. (It's no one you know Holly.) She has precious little time with her child. There are so many parents out there going through the same kind of thing. Just please, spend time with your kids! Next time you get that "No kids please" invitation for the 3rd time that month, consider sending your regrets. One day your children will thank you.

You should get married. You over there, however, should not.

My little sister and I were having a conversation recently, and she mentioned how she is annoyed by people who say that marriage is pointless. That it is "just a piece of paper", and they don't need it to prove anything. Now, I don't necessarily think that everyone needs to get married. However, I do think that couples, especially ones with children, should make sure to have some sort of legal documents if they choose to not marry. Such as a power of attorney, or a living will. Take for example, my sister and her boyfriend. They have been together for 20 years. That is more then half their lives. They have a child together, and are married in every way but legally. In their case, getting married would really only affect them legally. For instance, right now, if my not quite brother-in-law were to be injured and unable to make medical decisions for himself. His daughter is only 5, and he is not married to my sister. So, all medical decisions would fall on his mother. Luckily my sister gets along great with her, but that is not the case for everyone, and if you disagree with the decision that they make, you have no legal leg to stand on. Then on the other hand, some people get married to soon, or for the wrong reasons, and then end up divorced within a year. If you choose to get married, it should not be after only 4 months of dating, for insurance, or because you got pregnant. I get especially annoyed when couples end up with a surprise pregnancy, and are suddenly "engaged". No ring, no wedding planning, just forever engaged. Then they break up 6 months after the baby is born, still no ring, or wedding planning ever having happened. Or in some cases, the girl tragically suffers a miscarriage, and there is never a mention of the engagement again. Now, if you really feel that you need to get married because you are pregnant, fine. Get married. Do not, however, get "engaged" with no actual plans to marry, just because you think it's more socially acceptable. If you want to get married, get married. If you don't, then don't. However, please make sure that you are doing it, or not doing it, for the right reasons.