I never wanted a daughter....

It's true. I admit it. I wanted all sons. With Matthew, I knew the moment that the test turned positive that he was a boy. And that was exactly what I wanted him to be. With Alyssa, everyone assumed that I wanted a girl, since I already had a boy. But no, I wanted Matthew to have a brother. Instead, I got my princess, Alyssa. I never wanted a daughter....until I had one. Now, of course, I love my sons. Adore them even. After all, I only wanted sons, remember? And I was blessed with two wonderful boys. But that girl of mine... she is something else. She is such a girly girl sometimes. She loves to wear pink, loves dresses, purses, and My Little Ponies. She puts on her pretty pink dresses, has me brush her hair and put in pink bows, and goes outside to play in the dirt, with her best buddy, a worm, by her side. I never realized how cool it would be to have a little girl, who looks up to me so much. The other day, she wanted a fake tattoo on. She asked me to put it on her ankle, the right one, because that is where my tattoo is. Now, she tells me, we are twins. Just today she came out of her room in her Hello Kitty dress, with her pink sunglasses on, and her purse on her arm. She informed me that she is a mom, just like me, because she has a purse, just like me. But she is also 100% her own person, even at her young age. She is a little fashionista. The child is better at picking out matching outfits for herself then I am! That is all her, she certainly did not get that from me. Today, while I was browsing pictures online to get ideas for a haircut, she kept stopping me to tell me what hairstyles she loved. She has also decided that she wants to be an artist one day, more specifically, a painter. And I think it may just happen. She is my little artist already. She draws "abstracts", colors, and can draw a person much better then I can! We are the only girls, her and I, surrounded by boys. And us girls have to stick together. Especially when Lucas gets older and joins his daddy and big brother, doing all the "guy stuff". I always felt like I would be better at raising sons. I have never been very 'girly'. But, as it turns out, raising a little girl is pretty great too!

Stop Complaining!!!!

I think one of the things I hate on FB almost as much as the grammar and extra letters, is the constant complaining by certain people. My kids drive me nuts sometimes too. They bicker, they (and by they I mean ALYSSA, lol) run in the house, and sometimes forget to use their indoor voices. My husband isn't perfect either. He almost never remembers to take the garbage out, he leaves dishes and dirty clothes everywhere, and he can be a giant pain in the behind. And while we are on this subject, I don't always get along with my four sisters either. But I don't feel the need to post EVERY SINGLE DAY about how my kids are so terrible, and I can't handle them. Nor do I take to FB to declare my impending divorce each and every time I'm upset with my husband. Or disown my sisters once a week, when one of them irritates me. And do you know why? Because I'm not crazy. Come on now people. If your life is really that awful, you don't need to tell the FB community about it, you need to tell a therapist! Yes, we all need to vent once in awhile. I personally like to use the aforementioned four sisters to vent to, or the husband. Or one of my friends. Sometimes all of the above. But sometimes venting on FB just kinda happens. That is fine. But when every, or nearly every, one of your posts is complaining in some way about your awful kids, husband, family, or life in general, then something has to give. I have noticed as well, the ones who declare that "it's really over this time" after every fight with their spouse, never actually get the divorce. However, the two couples that I know who recently split up, never said a single word about it on FB. If you paid close enough attention, you may have noticed that one changed her relationship status to divorced, while one changed her's to single. Other than that, no indication whatsoever. Your drama and dirty laundry does not need to be aired for all the world to see. Also, while you are complaining about how awful your kids are, there is a mother out there somewhere wishing she could hold her baby one more time. Please keep that in mind.

It's all about the reaction...

That is what I tell my kids. How you react to a situation can change everything. This applies to adults too. Take my children, for instance. If I tell them to clean their room, and I get screams, fits, crying or attitude, that just makes me get a garbage bag and take care of it that way. However, if I get "okay, mom" and they do their best, I'm happy. Even if it isn't perfect. Or if Alyssa smacks Matthew. If he smacks her back, then they are both in trouble. But if he comes and tells me, then she will be the only one in trouble. Obviously this is all common sense, and most parents feel this way. But what about for yourself? How YOU react matters too. Not only does it shape how your kids react to things, but it also can change the whole dynamic of situations. If your child has a fit in public (and let's face it, we've all been there!), how you react can shape not only that fit, but all future fits. Now this is just MY opinion, but I think a lot of parents these days are too wimpy. If my kid has a fit either at home, or in public, I pick her up and remove her from the situation. End of story. I personally think that spending 20 minutes trying to reason with a 4 year old who is having a tantrum is insane. And because of my reaction, my daughter very rarely has fits in public. At home she is more willing, since that just gets her put in her bed. But if she has to leave the park/store/etc. that is no fun. I even once used this technique while babysitting my niece. We were trying to go for a walk, she started to have a fit and refused to move because Alyssa sat where she wanted to sit in the wagon. I didn't have the time to sit and reason with her, and I wasn't going to force Alyssa to move just to stop the fit. I had a crying baby who wanted to be moving NOW. So, I said "Nope, we are going", picked her up, set her in the wagon, and off we went. She pouted for about 30 seconds, then she was fine the entire rest of the time. I have never used it on a child not related to me though, so maybe it wouldn't work as well on a kid that isn't used to it ;) Anyway, it's not just about how you react to your kids. It's how you react to everything. Whether it's your husband forgetting to take out the garbage, your boss ticking you off, or the neighbor's dog barking all night long. Your reaction can make a bad situation better, or worse. So tell me, how do you react to things? How about your kids? I will admit that I am not always calm and rational. But I am trying my best to be. I want my kids to grow up to be able to handle bad moments with grace and good humor. They already talk about "reactions" all the time. Alyssa will ask me at least once a day if she is having good reactions today. Or if Matthew gets angry, she will say "Matthew, remember, reactions!" You can't control every situation, and life will not always be fair, or perfect. But you can control your own reactions.

Hanging with the boyfrannnnnnnnn....

I'm sorry...the what?! Boyfrannn...? When I saw this "word" on FB, I wanted very badly to ask the poster what the hell it meant, and if she actually SAID that word, or just typed it. So, I did. In this case, it was my baby sister, who was just being silly. But it brings me to my next rant. I absolutely HATE how some (most, sadly) kids, and even some adults type these days. What is with all the extra letters? If you type "Going to the storeeeeeeeeeee" instead of "Going to the store", does the inclusion of extra 'e's give it extra importance? My sister tells me it's the same as putting emphasis on that word. I told her that's what CAPS are for! It really drives me nuts. I mean, if you type "I'm sooooooo excited to go to the zoo tomorrow!", that is fine. The extra 'o's in so don't bother me. But when you type "Going to hanggggggg with myyyyyy guuuuurrrrlllll tonightttttttt", I want to punch you. Hard. Also, don't try to change the spelling of words. My is still spelled with a 'y'. Never, ever is it mi. That is the abbreviation for Michigan. It's also not miiiii. That is nothing, just letters. Girl is not gurl. And if you are going to take the time to write kno, why leave out the 'w'? One last thing. Please stop typing LiKe tHiS. It hurts my head. Sadly, I see that more in adults then kids. Peeeeaaaaacccceeeeeeeee Ouuuuuuuuttttttttttt hoooooommmmmeeeeessss!

What's your hurry?

I just don't understand what the big rush is. Every time I'm out driving, everyone around me seems to be in such a hurry! I got passed twice today on the way to the video store, and I was doing the speed limit. I'm sorry world, but I just don't see the need to speed everywhere I go. I wasn't late for anything, so why should I hurry? Now don't get me wrong, I'm not that annoying person who does 5 under all the time. I just stick to the speed limit. Although my sister might disagree with that! Anytime she rides in the car with me, she spends most of the time heavy sighing, rolling her eyes, and reminding me that "It isn't 35 until you hit the sign!". Sorry sis ;)  I have a friend who does ten over everywhere. Why? I have no idea. But she does have a pile of speeding tickets for her efforts. Personally, I think that, especially if you have children in your car with you, everyone just needs to slow down a little. Not because I'm worried that you will crash or anything (but please don't). But mostly because I have had the best conversations with my kids while we were in the car. Haven't you? My kids and I talk the whole time, and they say the best things! If you can't talk to your kids, because the radio is too loud, turn it down. You'll be alright. Also, stop texting and driving! Oprah and Justin Bieber would be very disappointed in you. Don't you ever watch Extreme Makeover: Home Edition?

Giving it a try!

This is my first time blogging, so please bear with me! Now, of course I fully understand that no one has perfect spelling/grammar/punctuation all the time. The occasional misspelled word does not send me into a nervous breakdown. But these days it seems that so many people have either forgotten how to spell, or never learned it to begin with. For instance, today I saw a comment on a picture of my sister that said " i miss u so fuckin much gurl.damn u got hella skinnyer.lol lookin sexy!" While I can appreciate that this young lady is attempting to compliment my sister, it hurts me to read that comment. I started to comment this; *girl  *any word but "hella" *thinner (for anyone not aware, the asterisk is frequently used when correcting grammar/spelling online). But I couldn't bring myself to be rude, even to someone I don't know. Tell me this, why do people insist on spelling girl with a u? Or take the time to write "I don't kno", but leave out that last letter? And seriously, what is with the word hella?? I have so many more, but I will leave them for another time. Tell me, what are your biggest spelling and/or grammar pet peeves?